Thursday, July 21, 2005

Nobody knows the troubles I've seen...

If someone wanted to avoid military service, they'd have done well to be born when I was. I was in HS as people were being flown off roofs in Saigon in helicopters as the Democrats implemented their go-to-hell-Vietnam policy. Draft registration was gone, and by the time it was reinstated I was exempt.

So I was never in danger of going to Vietnam against my will. I'm sure I would have if it had come up if only because every other man in the family had served in WWII, Korea or Vietnam, as had most of the older men I knew. I'd rather face the Viet Cong or anyone else than that crew.

But I wasn't looking forward to it. I had heard plenty:miserable weather, pungee stakes, booby traps, Jeremiah Denton blinking out Morse Code for "torture", and the heroism of the late James Stockdale.

No, none of that happened to me. I had better things to do, like going to bachelor parties at strip joints.

Never been to one? OK, pal, I'll play along.... Anyway, a bunch of guys would get the poor sucker and take him to someplace like Big Al's, talk to the MCs, money would change hands, and next thing you know a well-lubricated bachelor (or birthday boy) was onstage in a roomful of rude drunk horndogs.

Women in scanty clothing would rub up against him. DJs would ask how many of the crowd had slept with his wife to be, and everybody would hold up their hands and flip him off. The girls might strip him to the waist, use his tie for a loincloth, smack his bottom, make him crawl on the stage on all fours, pull their lingerie over his head and suchlike. And by the time the victim got home he had probably passed out or even soiled himself.

Little did I suspect that I was getting a foretaste of the horrors at Gitmo. What a moral failure I must be - not once did it occur to me to bring up the Geneva Convention.

Wednesday, July 20, 2005

Let the punishment fit the crime?

Do we need a law against this? "No, you sickie, that's not how you mount a horse!" Of course I'm assuming that this was a mare and he wasn't trying anything associated with Catherine the Great.

Exactly what is the appeal here, anyway? Is there something erotic about horses that I've missed? And why am I asking? - I really don't want to know.

No, I didn't get this from With Cheese, which is usually all over weird Seattle news. But then he posted something else that's disgusting in its own way. Let's OD the creep on Levitra and lock him in the stable with that horse.

Sunday, July 17, 2005

Class act...

From this:
May 24, 2005
Examiner Slams DC101's Elliot For Abortion Contest
An editorial in the Washington Examiner takes DC101 morning man Elliot Segal to task for having hosted a recent on-air contest offering a prize to the listener who claimed to have had the most abortions. "Segal thought it was hilarious when a woman called in to say her father forced her to get an abortion at age 13 after she was impregnated by her cousin. He jokingly offered a 'posthumous' award when another caller recounted a deceased woman's multiple abortions." Adds the Examiner: "The local station is owned by Clear Channel, which dropped shock jock Howard Stern's show last year for on-air obscenity. Segal's 'contest' doesn't fall under FCC definitions of indecent or obscene, although his trivialization of abortion is far worse than Stern's predictable vulgarity."
Yep, it's legal. But IMO anyone who's proud of their abortions is sick.