Beauty from the Beast

Of the millions of things I'm not qualified to do, giving beauty tips has to be close to the top. But sometimes even I can give a hint or two.

Tip #1 is to smile once in a while. You know, a real honest smile, not one of those reflexive masks we see on politicians and spokesmodels.

Alright, some of us aren't blessed. One minor celebrity I met usually looked sultry, but when I caught her smiling once she looked kind of goofy and rustic. They can be gummy or horsy or otherwise fubar, but there really aren't so many of these.

Another minor celeb had a nice smile because I had seen it on occasion. Then she stopped. When I asked, she told me she didn't smile for cameras because it made lines in her face. Heaven forbid.

One woman who worked in the same office with me was in her early twenties, and I would have sworn she had had a stroke. She would talk or blink, and once in a while she must have eaten, but other than that her face almost never moved. Then again, with the amount of makeup she wore it probably wasn't easy - near as I could tell her skin was fine. All the obvious effort she put into her face, but in a year or two I think I caught her smiling twice.

Another was a girl who must have been about 18 at the time. This one at least would smile, and she was very pretty, but she too wore makeup as if she were on stage. At her age and with her skin, I'd think lots of foundation et al would be more likely to cause problems than to cover them. I have to wonder if it wasn't intended almost like a mask to hide behind.

What do I know about makeup, anyway? Well, I've had to wear it before. But I had to quit - those lights and cameras put weight on you, and I've been trying to lose it ever since.