Politically correct trash talk

I was wandering through a bookstore and found a book called "In These Girls, Hope Is A Muscle". It's about a girl's high school basketball team from Amherst, MA that suffered repeated frustrations in the postseason. And they had to have been good - they had Jamila Wideman, who starred at Stanford on some excellent teams and played in the WNBA too.

Anyway, I read a few pages in. Amherst is a college town, which of course means political correctness of all stripes runs amok. Which caused some problems for the basketball team - what could they say for trash talk?

The coach came up with several examples: "I'm going to meet you outside the game and refuse to mediate". "You ignore your inner child". And the coup de gras - "So's your co-parent".

This just begs for a contest. Who can come up with the best PC trash talk?

Yes, I'm still alive

Life just got a little too busy there for a while, but I'm back for the time being. Everybody must have been worried. Right?...

Glenn Reynolds tells us that Daniel Taylor of Dreaded Purple Master had a heart attack. He's hospitalized and a full recovery is expected. Hang in there, bud.

For a good cause

I'm trying to assemble a list of songs involving dancing, preferably involving incompetence. Examples I thought of were "Your Mama Don't Dance" by Loggins and Messina, or "Long Tall Glasses" by Leo Sayer ("you know I can't dance, you know I can't dance..."). Any suggestions?